Category: ESSAY

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Essay: An Addict’s Ability to Project is Prolific


My experience and intuition tell me that this happens when a person isn’t in control of their own body, habits, and life. It’s ultimately a health issue and usually tied to addiction.

I grant that at the root of addictive behavior are deep emotional wounds, likely from childhood and unconscious or subconscious mind, and that we each want to feel better physically and emotionally and be freer. But at whose expense? It should be at your own expense. The rest of us should not be at the receiving end of your unwillingness to get some help. No one expects deep addiction issues to be handled alone. But the least we ask is that you not offload onto we civilians who are not professionals and seek professional help. I’m guessing there isn’t one person on the planet who doesn’t intimately know an active addict and it breaks everyone’s hearts; mostly your children.

It doesn’t matter how much you love someone or if they are your soul mate or your twin flame; the committed addict ruins everything. They have to use a drug to nullify their feelings and make every excuse in the book to use it and even break the law to justify it. Gee, what would that be? Civil disobedience to unjust laws that protect the public from irrational behavior while you’re on the substance or god forbid, you’re driving while on something?

You have to move on. There is no choice here or you will go down with their ship. It’s not worth it.

Alcoholism and other addictions are epidemics in our society and I’m so sick of dealing with it everywhere I turn. The weirdest part is when there is memory loss regarding communication. Even when you have proof of what they said in an email or text and they deny it. It’s unbelievable that someone can still attempt to pin a behavior on you when you have proof that they are the ones behaving that way. Goodbye. No trust.

I guess the definition of an addict is someone who is completely out of touch with their feelings and haven’t a clue what the truth is for them. So they go haphazardly through life, screwing up all of their relationships with friends, co-workers, employees, mates, and children. You would think that would be incentive enough to get some help but I’m guessing they’d just as soon stay in denial and lazy about getting a grip and fixing it. They have no inner courage.

Those deep wounds aren’t anyone else’s’ problem but theirs no matter how hard they try to tell you there is something wrong with you. That is the projection and there is no end to it. There is such a thing as an innocent party who is just learning that you are abusing a substance to the point of behavior change. Once we learn that they are not cogent, then it’s our responsibility to walk away and let the chips fall where they will. Otherwise, you’ll get into co-dependency instead of interdependency and that’s not going to help anyone.

Co-dependent is enabler and addict depending on one another to keep the addiction going. Health, money, structure, and life is in chaos for both. It’s a destructive cycle and no one is healthy or happy. All of your relationships are screwed up and most people who know you are mad at you.

Interdependent means you both are in charge of your own lives, know how you feel, express it, take care of yourself, have friends who like you and you like them, have your money and things organized, are able to say you’re sorry, and like any normal human being, have needs and want to depend on someone for support once in a while. Let’s hope we can pair up with the people we truly deserve, not the ones we don’t.

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Essay: Can We Love One Another Without Traditional Bonding?


I wrote this in 2018. Today is 6/26/26.

If you are twin flames or in love, this doesn’t apply.

It depends on how you define bonding which I address below. In spiritual circles, we say, “Love at all times”. So the heart is always open, to everyone and we are protected by Spirit and use our intuition as a guide so there is no fear. We still have to be discerning about how we express love. For indeed, there is no fear in Love. So, that’s the idea. Many highly spiritual people succeed in this so I know it’s possible. I do sometimes but I have a wild streak.

Like all good ideas, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t; boots on the ground kind of thing. When I put this to the test in my relationships with men and women I’d like to have a more specific plan since I’m a lover and a giver. My cup is always full and I need to empty it. That’s why I’m a giver. The last thing I need is more offloading, vampires, users, fakers and very unstable in my space looking for love that they need to find within and can find within. That’s when my cup empties quickly. That’s where discernment comes in.

How can we keep a strong boundary as empaths and lovers?

  1. If you truly love the other person, you accept where they are on the Self-Love spectrum. Don’t rush in where angels fear to tread. Instead, observe their behavior. Are they intuitive with you as you are with them? Are they emotionally sensitive to you when you need a shoulder or a hug or just to talk? They can give to you if they give to their own Self.
  2. Also, how much do they talk about their family? Are they still enslaved by a toxic family and defined by their toxic projection onto them? This issue is epidemic. Reiki aligns it.
  3. Do you love your own body enough so that when you have sex, you don’t suck energy from the other person but just “share” who you are? If you truly love your body you will just enjoy each other’s bodies, you won’t feel the need to possess the other. The other person can feel it if you do that.
  4. Is your conversation and dynamic peaceful with the other person? Or are there feelings of tension, or one person does all the talking all the time while the other one listens. Do they ask you how YOU are or is it always about them?

Intuition comes into play here more than reason. Studies have shown that humans highly communicate through body language. Everybody has different feelings but it’s not others job to figure you out. It’s your job to figure you out and know how you feel. It’s called maturity and mindfulness. You are the one IN your relationship, other’s are not or should not be, so they are of no use coming to a decision, ultimately. Our friends can be a sounding board for our own feelings though. That’s what friends are for; not to tell you what to do in a relationship.

How do we define bonding?

  1. “I miss you when you’re not here.” You’re bonded.
  2. “I need you next to me in bed”. You’re bonded.
  3. “I need to talk to you to feel secure.” You’re bonded.
  4. “I want to be with you more or most of the time.” You’re bonded.

The list can go on but it’s always, “I need”, “I want”. As an adult, you are able to regulate feelings of need and want via your brain. If your brain isn’t regulating it, put boots on the ground again and get exercising, moving, eating healthy and drinking water. It’s that simple. Just do it and stop pondering it.

Can women keep their feelings during sex and not bond? How?

Realize that your feelings are for yourself. The man is barely absorbing them or feeling them anyway because all he feels is your body. While it’s true that the body is your feelings and thoughts, being mentally aware of your feelings is a higher level of cognition that women have. Most men don’t have it. They haven’t evolved the skill of knowing how they feel past being hungry or horny. It’s unbelievable to women but it reminds me of Hermione in Harry Potter when she referred to Ron as having the emotional range of a teaspoon. And it’s unfair for women to expect most men to be any different. That’s like asking women not to have breasts. Of course, we have breasts. It’s natural.

I would say “Yes”, we can love one another without traditional bonding but it’s not realistic to expect others to be able to. 98% of humans bond to one another and thus we have all the problems that we do on earth.

People follow each other instead of their inner knowing. I personally think we need to grow past that but I certainly don’t expect it. True unity happens when we are all naturally sitting in our center. The fact is, we’re already bonded with all of life in the physical as one big family of Life. Just relax into that instead of adding another layer of latching on.

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Essay: A Pretty Good Brownie


I had a very good brownie yesterday with the right level of height so that I was able to observe my trip pretty well. This was purely experimental as I am the kind of person that fully enjoys the sobriety of my conscious mind to do my work because I’m intelligent. There is no substitute for the satisfaction of figuring something out or learning a new skill, for me. It’s a big self-esteem boost.

If I were trying to escape my body or my life, weed would plummet my self-esteem. That was my first observation. The second was that I had a bit of paralysis. Not literally. I could move but my etheric body wanted to leave my physical body which pulls the qi that allows you to move, right up and out. I do that plenty when I sleep at night, I don’t want to feel that way during the day when I have work to do.

If you DO want to feel that way during the day you need therapy; bodywork, Reiki, talk therapy; not medical marijuana. You’re in denial about your true feelings if you want to feel like that a lot. That will kill you because THE BACKED UP EMOTIONS go into your cells. Pot can’t kill you, no, but constant denial of your feelings and an unbalanced life will. It also throws off your appetite and sleep.

I commanded my etheric body to stay one with my physical and it obeyed. Because I did, I was able to observe and remember my trip. It was like being in an airport; public and stupid, full of non-focused, chaotic energy that I feel is the bane of this planet. But what happened is that because I wasn’t interested in traveling in the public ethers, I went deeper into my physical cells. I love my body, as my readers know, so I tuned into that.

Markedly, I had no pain. My muscles usually ache because I walk and work out daily. That was marvelous. And today I’m in less pain as an after effect so it is very anti-inflammatory. My cells got excited the more relaxed I was. I heard and saw my spirit guides laughing at my internal awareness so that was fun. It erased all of my physical tension. That is possible with yoga and breathe work though too.

Well, I was out of it for a full four hours and the last hour just loopy. That’s four hours of my life I won’t get back. I was grateful for the body awareness but I can do that on my own. I was just neglecting to do it because my brain has been busy learning computer programming. Also, no one should drive while using! It’s no different than alcohol.

The last thing I have to say is there was nothing spiritual at all about a pot-induced trip. It’s just a drug affecting the brain. I am a spiritual person and have had many spiritual experiences. It’s altogether different because you’re conscious and use your free will. The spirit world is real if you open your heart.

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Essay: Subject-Object in Life


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Essay; Physical Intuition Counts When You Fight (Freebie) Please Subscribe to hundreds more.


male-female

This is my theory anyway. When it comes to disagreement or a fight between partners, the physical relationship or sex dictates the way two people fight. This is a bit mysterious to me but I think we’ve always known that tension and competition between human beings are sexual. Right? It’s not particularly conscious but in a way, we’re all attracted to each other. I guess you could call it love, whether it’s heterosexual or homosexual. But which person we actually have sex with depends on those pheromones.

My intuition tells me that if a man brings no feelings to my body or his own body, and he feels he can mentally maintain the upper hand in a dispute, he would be incorrect. Feelings are more powerful and primal than thoughts. The body is emotions for men and women. I think this is why the presence of women in the public workplace is disruptive for males, whether they’re conscious of it or not. If they have no sexual relationship with her, they have no emotional connection and thus no real power over her. It is important for women to understand that love and feelings for a man happen in direct relationship to a woman’s physical body (sex). That is not the case for women! For women, feelings and bonding happen first through talking, communicating, VIBING (intuition). Then she decides whether to bring in sex which just adds another layer. Men need to understand that. If she is smarter or very smart, which women tend to be, she can dominate the situation at work where there is money involved. Think about that.

Thinking rationally is fairly new to human beings if not still novel! It’s wet paint on the wall of evolution, not yet dry. Humans are instinctual more than rational. Or you could view following your instinct as rational at this point. I’m not saying that scientific calculations are useless. But without intuitive calculations, they are not as likely to be correct.

Women can be rational and intuitive at the same time in a dispute. Men cannot. I believe women have evolved this ability as mothers in order to control our children. Rational thinking gave men a leg up in the evolution of the hunt so did they get lazy on intuition? Men’s intuition is an interesting subject and one I know nothing about. I do believe it’s there.

My point is when it comes to making an argument with your partner, the more your intuition is tuned into feelings or can read the situation, the more likely it is you’ll be heard and possibly even come to a resolution. Wouldn’t that be novel between women and men? (Sigh)

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Essay: Heartset; I Relate to Every Bit of This (Freebie)


@Lesia.Valentain1. She is not lonelier than those who don’t spend time alone. For some reason, people believe that if you are alone, you are lonely. Girls who love being on their own are an equal amount or less so than those who need people surrounding them. I know you want to question their decisions in isolating…

via 10 Things You Need To Understand About The Girl Who Loves Being On Her Own — Thought Catalog

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Essay; The Anima and The Animus


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Essay: Women and Men Express Love Differently


I wrote this post in 2018.

I’ve noticed on FB threads and my blogs that women like to hear my thoughts far more than men. Men want women to be quiet. That doesn’t mean we’re going to be but I’m approaching it from a biological brain difference.

Men can only take so much talking from others, except for their own. They love to hear themselves talk. Most women can’t get enough.

Over twenty years I’ve observed the energy and bodies of men and women and found that women need to talk but men don’t usually want to listen or talk. Hopefully, if your man does need to talk, he knows he can talk to you and you’ll be understanding. That should be reciprocated on occasion.

Men literally need our bodies or body language to communicate to us. We need their love (male heart vibe). So, men express love physically, not verbally.

Women express love mentally and emotionally because that’s what we each need. Men live in their minds with each other. Women live in their bodies with each other and it can be overkill either way.😌 I think that’s part of why humans tend to be heterosexual (male and female living together). I know I couldn’t handle living with a woman, sex or no sex. I’m woman enough for myself.

Do women hear men’s silent body language to us or do we assume it’s shallow objectification? Do men hear a woman’s feelings in her tone of voice and writing or do they just hear static blather? Sometimes neither one of us is listening but judging by our own bias instead.
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Essay: Breath controls Feelings


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Essay: Keep Living


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Essay: Is Reductionist, Axiomatic Science A Masculine Disorder?


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“Science is based on the professional creation and certification of knowledge which is tied to powerful interest groups, notably the state, corporations and the scientific profession itself. Patriarchy is based on male control of dominant social structures and the exclusion of women from positions of power through means such as direct discrimination, socialization and the gender division of labor.

Patriarchy within the scientific community is manifested through male control of elite positions and various exclusionary devices. The scientific method incorporates masculine features such as the objectification of nature. Scientific knowledge is masculine in its neglect of women’s experience and its adoption of paradigms built on assumptions of competition and hierarchy.”-Jill Bowling and Brian Martin, Ph.D.

Here is another article from an expert! It’s longer but VERY interesting.

Science: a masculine disorder

I woke up this morning, after being hijacked by “a friend” on a thread yesterday and then territorially denigrated in the patriarchal tradition, pondering the question; “Is the scientific method itself horse-and-buggy, materialist, patriarchal B.S.? Is this possible? Before today, I pretty much supported it, although its methodology seemed very simplistic to me and not at all holistic. Was I the only one wondering if this might be true?

I wonder this because as a fifty-four-year-old female who is trained in science as far as needed in licensed health care, my intuition is as consistent and rational as anything I see or feel in this material world. I also listen to it. This phenomenon is mostly ignored, cynically scoffed at, and at best, not understood by most people including my ex-friend who has patently disrespected my intuitive read of the Mayan Harmonic for months now. He just now told me how much better he is than me which kind of says it all. It means he’s not.

My patients have confirmed my hands-on intuition with their bodies for fifteen years so it’s like breathing to me now. I put my hands on someone and I can feel everything that’s going on. Then they confirm it verbally after I tell them what I sense. Then I treat on the manifested body and they feel it again. I don’t feel it physically initially; I sense the energetic cause of the physical manifestation which is the cause of all illness; thoughts and feelings or vibrations then I assess and treat tactilely.

My ex-friend, who fancies himself a scientist, knows nothing to very little about the body and doesn’t even work in the sciences. I’ve made my living in healthcare for seventeen years. There are lessons to be learned by all. For instance, in the last week I’ve learned two lessons:

  1. It is unwise to only see the good in people when their shadow is blasting you in the face. They operate from cynicism and usage; not love, and you can feel it.
  2. Many men do not have intuition on their radar and if they do, they subjugate it for the purposes of patriarchal power (money and control) or addiction. They view intuition as feminized or sub-cultural which would weaken their position in society. Other cultures can follow their intuition but patriarchal men from all cultures do not. They only use and objectify women sexually and poor people economically, no matter how nice they may seem and politically correct with their rhetoric. It’s fake. It takes an experienced and trained eye and ear to see it. The first tip-off is, they never ask you how you are, and if they do, it’s not genuine. You can feel it.

“Long-term structural change in science must be predicated on changing the relations between men and women.”

This applies across cultures, all over the world. The real issue of disparity on the planet is between women and men all over the world and the rest of the issues follow. Women are still treated in a barbaric manner, especially the child bride phenomenon.

“Complementing this approach is that taken by those specifically focusing on the reasons why there are not more women involved in the sciences. Several writers have examined science education, particularly looking at the reasons why girls leave science in their school years. Following the observations that boys get more teacher attention and girls have less confidence in their ability, in Australia, there have been some experiments with all-girls science and mathematics classes.

There has also been an analysis of the way in which science is constructed to reflect male values and suggestions about how to create a different sort of science. Arditti, for instance, argues for a feminist perspective which “would re-introduce and re-legitimize the intuitive approach”.

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Essay:The Erroneous Line Drawn Between Science and Spirituality


Remember this Philosophy Tree I posted a few posts ago? I love this thing. So let’s go back to the axiom at the top upon which all institutions of higher learning, all over the world, base their system of learning and degree-granting powers; Philosophy.

The major branches of philosophy

All subjects are philosophical. One of the great tenets of philosophy, established by the Greeks, is debate and discussion. It’s pretty anti-social to say, “I’m right, it’s been proven, no more discussion. Go sit down and be quiet.”

As objective as a physical scientist attempts to be with their scientific method, coming under the heading “Philosophy of Science”, they are subjective humans and can never be fully free from bias.

It’s proven by their emotional outburst of anger if someone wants to have a discussion with them after they make absolute statements and need everyone to agree with them because the philosophy of science is “the truth”.

“Playing well with others” learned in kindergarten is a good character attribute to have. I’m not saying I’m an expert at it being a high IQ woman, but I always start out being civil and it devolves from there adter I’m dogpiled by bottom feeders.

Gender bias is rampant in any STEM (Science, technology, engineering, and math) discussion where a woman needs to have a say.

It’s amazingly irrational, sort of proving my point above. I think it’s a good idea to qualify your work and be tolerant of dissent or a different perspective, otherwise, no matter how right you are, you lack integrity because you don’t care how you emotionally affect others.

So, look at that empty white space under “Philosophy of Religion” which comes from Ontology and Metaphysics”? Go over to the left and the Philosophy of Science branch is loaded. That is interesting, isn’t it?

Hardcore Newtonian Materialists would say, “That’s because we have hard evidence.” Yes, in your pants, which we women are happy for! But not when we have to earn money in the public workplace and you STILL have hard evidence.

I would say it’s because we live in a patriarchal society controlled by money and power in the hands of men in academic institutions who routinely denigrate the scientific method of females in psychology and religion which is spirituality. They are sciences too!

Now, look at “Philosophy of Mind”. It sort of waves the right hand over to “Philosophy of Psychology” saying, “Well, there’s this!” with a glass of wine in the left hand having a party with “Philosophy of Religion”. That’s sort of where we find ourselves in the year 2017.

We don’t have any boxes under Philosophy of Mind and Philosophy of Religion because we don’t have any money to do the experiments. There has been plenty of documentation and proof verifying that the study of Mind,

Religion (Theology), Psychology and Parapsychology are worthwhile endeavors, but you can’t see the material manifestation of feelings, thoughts, dreams, and intuitions as easily as you can see a ball rolling down a hill for a physics experiment.

Well, at the very least, our field is much more complicated. What can possibly be more complicated than studying how Mind manifests as feelings and physical being?

What is really changing now is proof from the quantum physicists that thoughts, feelings, and intuitions DO manifest in the body, literally, and cause illness or wellness, depending on how you align them. Everyone intuitively knows this. We don’t feel we need a double-blind study particularly, just some common sense.

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Essay: Moving from Subconscious to Conscious Mind


brain

Please read this short article.

From the Old Brain to The New Brain

“Some of the scientists who study the brain (neuroscientists, behavioral psychologists, etc.) believe the vagus nerve or spindle neurons that connect the prefrontal cortex (new brain) to the insula (old brain) may be the communication superhighway that links the conscious (new brain) to the subconscious (old brain). The subconscious brain may be using this very superhighway to communicate intuition, gut feelings and insight (aha moments) to the conscious brain.”-Thomas C. Corley

The latest neuroscience is investigating and talking about the “new brain” or the “conscious brain”. Humanity has been sitting in and using the subconscious mind for most of our existence (1 million years). The subconscious mind comes from parents, family, town, local provincial environment. It has totally helped us survive in a tribal world that expects certain behaviors. All of our institutions have grown up around it. It’s a sponge, defines our local reality, and is subjective. There is nothing objective or conscious about the subconscious mind! It pretty much defines brainwashing and most people’s reality on earth!

But in the case of the evolving brain, that’s a good thing. You have to understand and be able to get on with the locals to survive. Consciousness doesn’t happen overnight.

The subconscious mind comes from parents, family, town, local provincial environment. It has totally helped us survive in a tribal world that expects certain behaviors. All of our institutions have grown up around it. It’s a sponge, defines our local reality, and is subjective. There is nothing objective or conscious about the subconscious mind! It pretty much defines brainwashing and most people’s reality on earth!

But in the case of the evolving brain, that’s a good thing. You have to understand and be able to get on with the locals to survive. Consciousness doesn’t happen overnight.

But, as we can see by how pluralistic and expressive all people the world over are becoming and boundaries morphing, we see symptoms of humanity moving into the new brain or the conscious mind. It is just now occurring. Technology linking everyone is sort of the “leg up” here. We are starting to have unity of mind. That will morph too as our reality moves into the conscious mind and we express ourselves as individuals who are inter-dependent.

Technology linking everyone is sort of the “leg up” here. We are starting to have unity of mind. That will morph too as our reality moves into the conscious mind and we express ourselves as individuals who are inter-dependent.

Many that have been working in the holistic, spirituality, or paradigm shift movement have predicted this change since the 1970s, and have been experiencing events that are indicative of moving INTUITION in particular from the subconscious mind to living and manifesting in the conscious mind. The hippies started it. Most of my adult life (35 years from ages 20-54) has been defined by using my intuition IN my conscious mind and pushing my subconscious mind to the background. That is not usual but that’s what I did. The proof is in my new book “Healer”. There is no way I would have been able to overstep subconsciously created, reality-based events that were foisted on me if I was not residing in my conscious mind. The Universe had my back and I was cared for.

Most of my adult life (35 years from ages 20-54) has been defined by using my intuition IN my conscious mind and pushing my subconscious mind to the background. That is not usual but that’s what I did. The proof is in my new book “Healer”. There is no way I would have been able to overstep subconsciously created, reality-based events that were foisted on me if I was not residing in my conscious mind. The Universe had my back and I was cared for.

While it may be true that all thoughts originate in the provincial subconscious mind, those of us that have not accepted our upbringing as the totality of reality, didn’t like or agree with our upbringing, or felt our upbringing fell far short of real love, want to move quickly into our conscious brain, or “new brain” because we’re happier and feel more in charge of setting our destiny.

Intuition “up”