Today is Red 11 Dragon. Alligator is another name for Dragon. The alligator is a descendant of the Dragon. Tone 11 is Spectral and dissolves, is creative and chaotic, liberates and releases. People’s minds and awareness are being changed by the fact that they’re realizing how controlled they’ve allowed themselves to be by the media, their families and society and are starting to kick back. People are animals. Some want to roam free and others are afraid of it. Some people want to be told what to do and then when they are they rebel. We’re at a tipping point now but all the energy and support is here for us to break out and sit in our truth.
Red Dragon is blood memory or family karma, primordial mother, nurture, being, and birth, supportive and creative. But when you add tone 11 to that it tends to explode if there are too many lies and controls around the mother-child bond. It would be best to take it easy today and release anything you need to in meditation or on a punching bag. Either that or don’t think about it. Distract yourself with something else unless you have time and energy to deal with what’s surfacing. It would be too easy to say things you’ll regret later so think before you speak. Just because it’s true or how you feel doesn’t mean it needs to be said.
It’s only 11:15am in Michigan and I’ve already been at the receiving end of three offloads from out of left field. I then sit back and strategize and what action to take. I won’t answer texts of FB IM’s from friends who want counseling or my opinion. I’m working. Stranger offload I just ignored because he was incorrect. Nothing new. Humans are wrong in their assessment and actions most of the time. You’d be wasting energy reacting to that.
I retreat during fireworks and I think it’s smart to retreat from humans today. Social distancing is a good excuse.
Cysteine is Red 11 Dragon, Tyrosine is the analog White 11 Mirror, Asparagine is the antipode Blue 11 Monkey and the Hidden Wisdom is the Stop Codon, Yellow 3 Sun.
The dream in the hologram hasn’t ended but the spell has. We are in a matrix of creative magic. Time is art. That will never change but there is no more casting of spells over us that control our lives or Destiny; particularly Jupiter or Saturn Time Thieves or nefarious E.T.’s. I’m speaking of in-person testimony from military whistle blowers who have seen, heard, and been places that are being kept secret from the American Public and know things about our local solar system that are kept from us. There is plenty of tech and information that’s been given to us now that we can seriously change our life style on the surface for the better if The President and handful of elite tech companies will respect humans and share. We might not want to count on them having a change of heart but the Network Grid around the planet no longer supports the success of the selfish MINDSET. The unified group mind, balanced in female and male, in dark and light, in ying/yang has taken hold now.
Magic is INSIDE our bodies and our focused minds can co-create with our Creator. That is fully possible on Earth now. Most of what is occurring has everything to do with our BODIES and whether we love ourselves or not. Our lives are a blank canvas and our bodies are the paintbrush with which we paint our lives. We choose the details of our destiny and that is Universal Law as long as we can focus our owns minds and apply ourselves. That’s been the hiccup so far.
Today is Yellow 6 Warrior which is about organizing our lives so we can question everything we see in The Matrix, this hologram of time and DNA spinning in and around us. It’s a dynamic ART STUDIO run by our minds and intentions. I was thinking this morning how much I dislike being able to pick up vibes from people I know coming in my psychic space uninvited and then I’m able to read them. They don’t have an appointment. Why are they coming to mind in a negative fashion?
It’s up to me to overstep their energy wanting to come into my space because they’re benefiting from me but I’m not benefiting from them, and FOCUS my mind on what I DO want in my space and get busy. When you form this habit of being able to pivot your mind you are able to output intelligence for the goal of equality! There is no natural equality on Earth; we all have to apply ourselves. The ones that don’t apply themselves are going to be victims and want to be rescued.
The analog is Blue 6 Night which is dreaming, intuition, and abundance. We all need to get on that beam and it takes mental discipline. The mediating planet for Yellow Warrior and Blue Night is SATURN. Blue Night is logical, powerful, conservative, introspective and has extra strength to endure. Guide Power is itself which gives the day extra ummpph.
The antipode is White 6 Worldbridger so in order to achieve our own mental focus we’re going to have to forgive people who come into our space to take and are not interested in reciprocation, giving or sharing. Forgiveness is about cutting a cord and setting a boundary. That person is no longer allowed in your mental space. This is a multidimensional transformation because you realize you have A DUTY to honor your time and your body to get the work done you came here for. You don’t have time for users and off loaders and you’re literally not supposed to entertain them in your space. It is a type of death and one you’ll come to embrace.
The Hidden Wisdom is Red 8 Galactic Serpent who models integrity and harmony. We use survival instinct and life force to paint the picture of our lives. It doesn’t have to be “beautiful”. It can be whatever you prefer just as long as you realize many people might not like it because it’s not their thing and will turn away. People don’t have to agree but they also don’t need to get dramatic or mean about dissing. Humans are weird about the group agreement thing. Just do your own thing if others are not in affinity. It’s not negative at all to be by yourself for awhile.
The 5Gforce is Yellow 8 Seed or Galactic Targeting on the earth plane. That is accomplished through Source, Sirius and our Sun
Today is 8/11/20 and tomorrow the gate to the portal closes. This is an extra dimensional portal between the star system Sirius and our Solar (the Sun) System.
On the Network Grid or The Tzolkin, we are on Blue 5 Overtone Eagle or Radiant Vision. The Lion’s Gate brought forward the Divine Feminine and the need for balance with the male on Earth. We are certainly lagging behind the rest of the inhabited universe on this issue.
Today is Blue 5 Overtone Eagle whose attributes are creative Mind and vision. “The most obvious differences between male and female Bald eagles are their size. Females are usually a third of the size largerthan males. Females tend to weigh between ten to fifteen pounds more. … Whereas the males weigh between five to ten pounds less, with a wingspan reaching up to six feet.” Female eagles are larger than the male.
I have never heard this talked about in the public square or in the media. It’s an amazing fact given that the eagle is the main symbol for aggressive, male dominated, patriarchal institutions such as the military, the Nazis, and ancient Rome. Well, guys, the female is bigger. I have to admit, as a straight female, that’s not very hot. I can see why it’s an issue.
Blue 5 Overtone Eagle is 5 Arginine. It aids in heart function, immune system and relaxing arteries or blood pressure.
Lions and eagles both command respect with their attitude. That is also tone 5 the overtone whose attributes are commanding, radiance, and empowerment. Overtones have an air of confidence about them which command confidence, admiration and respect. On earth, fear really means respect that may turn to love over time or not. The saying, “It’s better to be feared than loved” isn’t straight forward. If people love you because you do whatever they want you to do and you want to please them they’re not going to respect you. But if they fear you they will respect you and that leads to love.
So love is portrayed two ways really. “I love you because you’re my doormat and you let me use you” and “I love you because you’re not my doormat and won’t let me use you.” Which one of those is love depends on what the other person needs at the time. Or, if you’re like me, it doesn’t matter what the other person needs because I stay true to myself at all times and never function as a doormat whether they need that or not. It matters what the other person needs if I’m in a committed love relationship, to a point, or with a client who is paying me.
As I read what I’ve written it’s clear to me that none of that is Love. We don’t love others based on what they give and don’t give but simply because of who they are no matter what, good and bad. Maybe that’s a good space to shoot for in male-female relationships.
The Fourth step through the gate is self-respect, honoring your vision and what you want to do with your life and your body and always holding the value of female-male gender equality in your relationships.
White Self Existing 4 Wizard sits alone meditating blissfully. She-he is not thinking about work, partying, money, sex or food right now and maybe not most of the time. His support is Red 4 Serpent who is measuring the situation with instinct in order to survive.
He is guided by White 4 Dog, big self-love from God. This kin is red -pilled after being in the darkness and refusing to see what God sees in us or even believing God is real. This is no blue-pilled New Age hippie sitting only in the Light. She has been through the fire, lost jobs, mates, children, career, health that she turned around herself, and has ideas that few will get behind because women’s ideas aren’t as exciting as men’s? She keeps working anyway. She works with integrity and love, and pays her bills by herself. She has the guts to have gray hair knowing it means she’ll probably never have sex with a man again in a society where women are objectified for their youthful looks but men can be old and still stay busy? Maybe he can.
Yellow 4 Seed plants her garden. She doesn’t need anyone else to understand what she’s doing but she’s happy to explain it if they do. She’s just going to do it. He doesn’t need permission from a woman to take care of himself nor is he looking for a mother. He’s a self-sufficient man that can reciprocate from the heart. Many men have big hearts.
The Hidden Wisdom is Blue 10 Hand; planetary accomplishment. Maybe not by societies’ standards but by his peers he is accomplished and with this kin, plenty are jealous. His level of receptivity is prolific and can’t be matched and there is suffering for being that creatively receptive. He is a muse.
The 5GForce is White 10 Wizard. This is the Day that I met my fiance Michael who died 3 months after my son’s father died who was White 4 Wizard. My husband, White 4 Wizard was autistic savant and it was Michael who had a Master Degree in special Ed who told Dave he needed to take and test to see if he was Autistic and indeed he was. He found out 3 months before he died, why his life was so difficult thanks to Michael (Red Serpent). Dave spent his entire life wondering why he was so different. He was a legendary jazz musician here in Grand Rapids but not terribly loved. Other musicians competed with him a lot and socially he did not mirror others.
The huge synchronicity is that Michael was Red Serpent, the analog right next to Dave and indeed, he supported him in that very intelligent talented people are not LESS, but equal in our society. I met Michael on Dave’s GForce, White 10 WorldBridger so that he could be the SUPPORT Dave needed and also a support for my son and I. Worldbridger is about death and change and the two died 3 months apart. SYNCHRONICITY!!
I perfect in order to equalize. Producing opportunity I seal the store of death With the planetary tone of manifestation. I am guided by the power of timelessness.
Happy Magic Flight of the White Mirror Wavespell at the center of the Tzolkin! Today, we transcend the 13-day Wavespell of Endlessness through the Power of Heart, which is coded by Kin 130 (Cosmic Dog), the manifestation of Cosmic Love! Exactly, Kin 130 = 13.10 (Tone 13, Seal 10 / Wavespell 10) and it contains the Power of 13 x 10 (Love) = 130.
Kin 130 sits at the Heart of the 13:20 Tzolkin Matrix and also at the Center of the Dreamspell Harmonic 33.
Kin 130 represents the Omega Point of the first half of the Tzolkin, while tomorrow’s Kin 131 is the Alpha Point of the second half of the Tzolkin. Today, we enter the Infinite Galactic Centre which is a portal to higher dimensional realms of consciousness.
Through the Power of 33, our spiritual umbilical cord is telepathically connected to the Hunab Ku, the Heart of the Galaxy. “Kuxan Suum: Literally the “Road to the Sky Leading to the Umbilical Cord of the Universe,” defines the invisible galactic life threads or fibers which connect both the individual and the planet, through the Sun, to the galactic core, Hunab Ku.”––Jose Argüelles. The Mayan Factor.
This Kin 130 marks the entrance into the first Tzolkin Heart of the current Magnetic Wizard Year, as well as it signals the conclusion of a timeless Crystal Hologram right at the Centre of the Harmonic 33. This multi-dimensional Model of Ascension was opened through the recent Transit of Mercury on 11.11.19 (11 November 2019), covering a 9-day period until 19 November. This 11:11:19:19 Hologram accurately inscribes the Solar Sequence of Ascension of the Crystal Prophecy, which demonstrated through the interaction of the 13:20, 11:11, 19:19 and the 33:33 matrix systems.
As we mentioned on this wavespell blog, for the Ancient Maya the mirrors were portals to the afterlife. The number 13 represented the “13 Heavens” that come after the journey of the dead through the “9 Underworlds” of Xibalba.
Exactly, the bearer of this Wavespell, Kin 118 (Magnetic Mirror) is equivalent to the Maya sign of 1 Etz’nab, which is the Ascension Code of King Pakal (Pacal Votan) in the Maya RealTime. 30:18:1:118
Alpha Birth 8 Ajaw (Kin 60) + Omega Death 6 Etznab (Kin 58) = 1 Etznab (Kin 118) = Mirror Wavespell In this way, Pakal entered commanding this wavespell in order to access the “13 Heavens” of Maya Cosmology on Kin 130 and transcend as Cosmic Love.
May everything be known as the light of mutual Love! Ah Yum Hunab Ku Evam Maya E Ma Ho! All Hail the Harmony of Mind and Nature!
19 November 2019 ~ NS 1.32.5.5 Wavespell Blog: https://wp.me/p83Oy1-3RC ___________________________________________
KIN 130: White Cosmic Dog
I endure in order to love Transcending loyalty I seal the process of heart With the cosmic tone of presence I am guided by the power of timelessness
Harmonic 33: Lunar Process Formulate Free Will of Challenge
* Journey: – Tzolkin: Day 130. Mystic Column 7 of the Self-Existing Dragon. – Wavespell of the White Mirror: Final Day 13. – Cosmic Gate (Tone 13): Take Magic Flight! – Blue Western Castle of Burning. Court of Magic. – Galactic Season of the Sun: Yellow Fire. Power of Universal Fire.
• Kin Synthesis: 13 Dog Solar Seal: Dog – Action: Love – Essence: Loyalty – Power: Heart Galactic Tone 13 = Cosmic – Function: Presence – Creative Power: Endure – Action: Transcend
Tone 2, Polar/Lunar is about Dualism and polarization in order to stabilize. There is a mountain of polarization all around us right now; partisanship Pub and Dem, Mask-No Mask, Fearful vs. Confident, Truth vs. Lies, healthy vs. unhealthy and onward. Don’t we get bored with polarization? I do. But knowing what you don’t want helps you laser focus in on what you DO want so you can set your intentions more directly and accomplish something.
I’ve written extensively over ten years on this blog about using your feelings as road signs but not a map. The antipode today is Red 2 Moon, the Moon is Square Libra and the archetype for Libra is the Scales. Our challenge and gift today is to try to find a modicum of balance in our feelings.
The Goddess Justice or maybe Athena
There is the Goddess of Justice on the right. I love that she has the sword in her hand. She picked that up yesterday as an archetype of White Mirror. Yesterday was White 1 Mirror or magnetic discernment. Notice she has the blindfold on too so that she does not make decisions based on gender or cultural bias. That’s like music auditions for orchestras taking place behind a screen because professional orchestras are notorious for being all male. It’s very easy to observe the boy’s club in every profession showing that the men want to get away from the women so they can focus. Women are relegated to “a role” for men for that very reason. We are extremely distracting for them. The fact being that when a woman walks into a room of males, all the attention goes to her if she is the least bit attractive. Men are hard wired. Such is not the case with a a man walking into a room full of women. We’re looking but by no means are we distracted. Women are very able to focus and get our work done no matter what profession we work in.
Today is Blue 2 Storm whose attributes are catalyzing, Energy and Self-generation along with the the Tone 2 attributes. There is a Virgo feel or Mercurial feel to Blue Storm as well, maybe because Pluto is SO far away and has had it’s identity messed with lately. I don’t know if it’s back in the solar system club or not. Speaking of justice, I’m pretty sure that was all politics.
Astrological Synchronicity
“The Moon continues its transit of Libra today, and we seek fairness and harmony. There can be some restlessness or competing ambitions and needs to manage. We can see a more sober side of Libra with the Moon’s square to Pluto and then Saturn this afternoon. This is in synchronicity with Blue Storm∞Yellow Sun having PLUTO as their mediating planet. The urge or need to socialize and connect with our relationship goals can seem to clash with our ambitions and responsibilities. A Jupiter-Neptune long-term transit perfects tomorrow, and we’re inclined to seek and find inspiration.” -Cafe Astrology
Jupiter and Neptune mediate Yellow Seed∞Blue Eagle and Red Dragon∞White Mirror. More likely this is karma related. Also, Red 2 Moon is the antipode today so the Libra Moon is square to that as well calling for a need to stabilize emotions.
MOLECULAR LINE-UP
Theme in the center is Blue 2 Storm-Tryptophan
Analog on the Right is Yellow 2 Sun-the Stop Codon
Guide Power above is Blue 2 Monkey-Asparagine
Antipode on the left is Red 2 Moon-Methionine the start codon
Hidden Wisdom below is White 12 Wind-Glycine
5GForce is Red 12 Dragon or Cysteine
I see in our mediating Amino Acid Tryptophan (Blue Storm), the hexagram and pentagram of Saturn and Jupiter. That is a DNA FINGERPRINT in our cells because they helped us regroup and survive once we escaped to Earth as refugees post Maldek disaster. The proof of this disaster is the asteroid belt that is literally there today. How do we feel about the 12:60 intervention now?
We see the 12:60 intervention/control in our institutions of government and Church. Do we really still need those to control our dysfunction? Did our dysfunction cause the Maldek blow up? I think it did. It’s well known that many humans feel much more secure if they have an authority figure over them telling them what to do because they’re brains are not yet fully civilized. We see that playing out right now as we speak and I think all of this has been a test to see who is in control of themselves and who is not.
Once a majority of humans no longer need the control of 12:60 our sun will fully relay 13:20 to our planet, our original coordinate for earth. Don’t wait. Follow along with a 13:20 app today. They even have wall art/calendars if you prefer but the time is past to have your mind aligned with 13:20 so we can be done with this polarization and live unified amidst diversity.
This is a play day, which we all need. Whenever it’s Tone 7, whatever you think, do, or feel will boomerang like a voice in a cave. It echos so choose wisely. Tone 7 is actually also aligned with 12:60, the coordinate earth was forced into by Jupiter and Saturn. Since 7 was right in the middle of the Creative Tones it had the resonant effect for 12:60 that they were looking for in order to control things down here. That’s how 7 came to be considered LUCKY but 13 was UNLUCKY. There is no such thing as luck. But the fact is 13 is far more balanced and powerful for earth than 7 is. 13 also equalizes the power between female and male which is THE NORM throughout the galaxy. Earth is the odd one out there because of the time theft and we have much to correct. Our gender imbalance problem is toxic and anti-social.
Kin 111 is quite synchronized with the 11:11 phenom! The attributes for Blue Monkey are Play, illusion and magic. Blue monkey is artistic, spontaneous, trickster, innocent, humorous, extraordinary, divine clown, curious, co-creator of a higher life, transparent, and communicative.
Resonant Tone 7 is about inspiration, attunement, and channeling.
The analog is Yellow 7 Star; beautification, art, and elegance
The Guide power is yourself; Blue 7 Night is dream, intuition and abundance
The antipode is Red 7 Dragon; nurture, being, and birth
The Hidden Wisdom is White 7 Dog; Love, Loyalty, and Heart
Transcend the illusion of a virus more powerful than your mind and intention. It’s not.
Transcend the silliness of a mask.
Transcend the fearsome darkness of death
Transcend the spiritual blindness of the media. Ignore them.
Kill your T.V.
Get your heart pumping and move your blood
Laugh with friends
Walk away from toxic people
Have great, loving, sex
Ignore propaganda from all institutions who want your money
Eat some veggies and grains
Set boundaries with your family
Draw, paint, write, dance or make music
Check out a new deli, cafe, or bakery
Decide to be your own best friend and be kind to yourself in choosing what emotions to run. No matter who your feelings are about, they won’t feel them but you will.
I remember writing this two years ago and it still holds. What a riot.
When scamdemic started in March 2020 and they started lockdowns, I and millions of others saw through it. I was very outspoken from the beginning. As they got serious over two years, my holistic biz page was kicked off of FB. All of my FB friends unfriended me and I unfriended them. I got hate mail from 3 patients who said the virus was my fault. I was shadow-banned on Twitter and now I’ve been kicked off of LinkedIn. There is a price to pay for honesty if you’re a woman. Working to be a cut above has its challenges.
I get a kick out of all of it. The Universe has my back and if you do the same, they will have yours.
I’m not a Pub either. No way. Politically I’ve been a Centrist for a long time which right now leans toward Justin Amash 2020 who is actually my neighbor from West Grand Rapids. He grew up in this neighborhood and has actually visited my house.
I feel much better about myself being honest in the political stance I was raised to despise. My family are all liberal, far left-wing Obama worshippers, and believe he is the reincarnation of Jesus Christ, so…that’s not working for me. It’s just the government, not a church. My great grandfathers Townsend risked a limb or two and wrote the freedom of religion clause for the Flushing Remonstrance that was eventually included in the Bill of Rights. I’m not giving that one away. No establishment of religion in America!
The most nauseating part of this is that on my personal wall on Facebook unless my picture is smiling and cute or pretty and I post little niceisms about my son or the weather, I’m absolutely ignored. If I post anything powerful against the panicdemic that is absolutely true from licensed physicians or nurses, or epidemiologists, I’m ignored.I really want to unfriend every one of them that have dissed me because I’m opinionated and an activist for physical and financial sovereignty in a culture that views human beings as stupid commodities to be manipulated until the funeral industry can make a pretty penny off of your death. (They unfriended me actually)
I want to create a new, powerful, more outspoken than ever persona that is as calm, lucid, intelligent, and beautiful to the point where no one can see me coming. I’m not bothering with resisting idiots, I’m BEING who I am in my full power and could care less what anyone’s reaction is. Facts are facts. Feelings are feelings. We are each free under our Constitution. If you believe the news media or watch a lot of TV your brain is fried and I’m not helping you. I want to be intimidating. I do think it’s better to be feared than loved on this planet of little human love.
What I can’t quite figure out is the odd time fold where my mind flipped fully away from liberal, left-wing thinking. For years, I’ve found the Disney trope of Democrats to be nauseating; their fear of anything outside of their comfy Protestant church service, hometown, their grandchildren, and quilting to be mind-numbing, their WASPYness making me crave a raft of ants in the rainforest to gobble them up. (Wasp vs. Antman).
The Trump lovers on Twitter are even bothering me. I fully support the disclosure of 100 years of secrets regarding the ETs and tech but I wonder how it’s going to happen without the liberals losing their minds. Hillary and her elite clique being Luciferian, bloodthirsty pedophiles I don’t find hard to believe but if they really let this out some Americans will go over the cliff. Are the right-wingers serious that we are supposed to believe that there are NO REPUBLICAN Luciferians? , the Pubs are lily-white on this issue? No way. The entire government is corrupt and all the institutions with it.
I’m not sure what this new world will bring but I’ve most definitely run away from home, far, far away from the National House and I’m never coming back. They are the biggest pack of liars and their followers the biggest flock of sheeple I’ve ever seen.
I have 311 followers on here now. Thank you! There are eight years of writing so feel free to explore. My books are available for purchase on the books tab and Healer is on Amazon.
I’ll do my best to get on the reader and see what’s up with everyone.
I wrote this ten years ago today and forgot about it. Good ole’ FB memories
To all the Mothers:
Happy Mother’s Day.
May the abundance of the Earth and the light of the sun, moon, and stars wash your feet with the holy water borne of many tears turned to a blessed stream ambling through a heart full of joy. -ME (5/9/10)
I guess the saying above could apply to women and to men but women are quite a bit more pre-meditated in choosing which men to talk to and then sleep with. Our lust does not control our rationality, much to men’s dismay. Sometimes mine does but I’m working on curbing it now that I realize men fall in love easier than women do, even it’s just our breasts they’re in love with.
This is especially the case for women of reproductive age. So mostly, this applies to women. Just because a man desires you doesn’t mean he values you. For men, this could say, “Just because a woman likes to talk to you doesn’t mean she values you or loves you.” But if SHE SAID she loves she does. We don’t say that lightly.
If people are not possessions then relationships with them cannot be assessed like an insurance adjustor would assess the damage done to a car.
I’m following up on my previous post “Bonding Instead of Possession”, and suggesting a compromise between men’s dualistic approach to relationships which is either promiscuity or possession. Analyzing a relationship is not akin to being an insurance claims adjustor. It’s a matter for your HEARTSET to assess the situation which entails your feelings and then use intuition since feelings only lead to intuition which is the higher mind. No one is called to act on, indulge, or hold on to their feelings. Feelings are supposed to lead to the movement of Mind and Heart so we can make informed choices. You can’t leave out Heart or Mind or it will fail. That’s the whole point of knowing your feelings and it’s not minor. The Intuition leads to the higher mind and the rational leads to the lower mind. One is fast, one is slow. I didn’t figure that out, the scientists did, nor do I really like the situation but that seems to be the way the brain is laid out for now until we evolve differently.
Promiscuity or possession is an all or nothing approach, a decisive approach that actually is emotional, even passionate based on physical lust, need, and desire, not love.
Why is it considered normal and acceptable for men to not want a relationship but not women? Many women, including me, like being single, but I like friendship, love, and sex but I don’t want to be in a relationship. I like my absolute freedom and need it. I also like monogamy but only if the man doesn’t go overboard.
Can a man process all of that and accept that I don’t want to possess or control him and he can’t possess or control me?
So far, no.
Now in 2025, I think there are unique circumstances where two people love each other and want to be together. You have to go with the flow. But if STAFF and FAMILY or money are interfering with two people being together that is PURE EVIL. The universe needs to intercede and synchronicity needs to control the situation. There is no stronger magnet on earth than love.💞
Do you know the difference between lust and love? I’ll go with the hard one first; Love. Love is when you want to take time to really know someone, to care about how they feel, what they need and what makes them tick. You want to be their friend. Friendship is the basis of all lasting, lusty, good relationships. It takes time and maturity to grow.
Lust is everything else. Anything that’s not love is lust. Lust is the emotion behind most human interactions and has the face of greed, trolling on Facebook, offloading on strangers and the like. If you have no foundation of care and face-to-face friendship (not digital only) with someone you are indulging in instant gratification lust and there is nothing loving about it.
This issue has been challenging for me. I’m a very passionate, physical woman and have no problem lusting after men who are very attractive to me. I don’t act on it; it’s just fun. My personality and values are all about love. There isn’t really any other material thing I lust after; unless I’m really hungry. then I lust after food.
That’s a good segue because food hunger is almost exactly like sex hunger in the brain. And notice how many people overeat when they just need some love, affection, and sex. We’re looking for a serotonin spike and some other juicy brain chemicals that make us happy. I know I am. Food doesn’t come close to making me happy the way intimacy and love does. I don’t even like bothering to stop and fix food because I’m busy with my projects, writing, chores, things I love to do! Why do I have to stop and eat? I’ve always been like that. I’m not terribly fond of slowing down.
Now we see a problem here; denial of human need when you know it’s not likely to be easily fulfilled! I’ve been married three times to great men and had several great boyfriends. I’m still not satisfied. They weren’t perfect or didn’t satisfy me the way I really want to be. They didn’t make my brain and body explode with orgasmic happiness, although my last mate Michael came close. He loved me…really, really loved me and I loved him. Love is the sexiest thing going. Then he died suddenly. That’s not helping the situation. Love is definitely tragic.
It makes me wonder about eating disorders. If you take that denial of the need for love, warmth, and affection far enough it would make your brain or specifically, the hypothalamus gland stops craving food. So the emotion of lust would be good at this point versus the emotions around deprivation.
I’m not into deprivation at all but I am sorely afraid of loving a man, pulling him to me, and pushing him away because I need to be alone with my ideas, my mind, my life, my work, and my writing. I don’t want to hurt him. There has to be some intimacy and some time shared with your loved one or they will go away. I hate that.
I think I’ve stayed in lust mode in my brain because I’ve lost too many people I’ve loved. It’s like a car idling. My life isn’t idling but my feelings about bonding in a relationship are definitely idling.Maybe I’m stuck in lust gear because it’s emotionally safer. There is no risk of having your heart ripped out and stomped on the floor by death and life itself if you don’t go into love gear and really start driving.
How many bazillion times have you heard a guy say “No drama!”? They act like they give women no drama. Men are over the top!!! Men get emotional physicallyand sometimes verbally. Their actions are too dramatic. That’s the testosterone and they put WOMEN through the wringer not being able to calm down their testosterone or my favorite, being so confused about how to relate what they want to us that they send dual-minded, conflicting signals. A lot of women think they’re lying but half of the time I think they just don’t know what to say…literally.
Women are more dramatic in expressing themselves verbally. Women are actually brilliant at expressing themselves verbally and men are FOREVER telling us to be quiet and stop being so dramatic. I fucking hate it nor will I obey. I find men and women to be equally expressive emotionally but in these two different modes.
Next time a man says to you, “Cut the drama” when you’re speaking and expressing your feelings, bring down the curtain on his ass regarding how his actions are overdramatic expressing HIS feelings. He can “cut the drama” too. Sheesh!